|
EW
Rates the Four Most Melodramatically Magnificent Daytime Soap Operas
LOVIN' THE AFTERNOON
| We
didn't give a flying fig about soaps-and then we heard that All
My Children's Bianca (Eden Riegel) was a...lesbian!
With postholiday blahs settling in, EW happily returns to a land
of amnesiacs, cuckolds, and harsh lightning. Here, a
guiding light to four must-see sudsers, rated on a one-to-four
bubble scale. -Nicholas Fonseca |
|
|
ALL
MY CHILDREN (ABC)
The concept: 7th
Heaven x Peyton Place2
Reason to watch: The saga
of socialite Erica Kane (Susan Lucci, right with Riegel) and her
just-out teen daughter, Bianca. Look Ma, no boys.
Fast-forward alert: The coma inducing
story of Ryan Lavery's declining dotcom.
Emmy-worthy dialogue: "You can't
own my Life, Edmund...You can't take my power because you are nothing
but a stable boy!"
Bubbles:
31/2 |
|
THE
BOLD AND THE BEAUTIFUL (CBS)
The concept: (Dynasty
÷ Models, Inc.) + Melrose Place
Reason to Watch: The half-hour
running time is perfect for the gym. Plus, it's the only
soap with zaftig, redheaded fashionista Sally Spectra (Darlene
Conley).
Fast-forward alert: Scenes with
teeth-clenching drunk Deacon (Sean Kanan).
Emmy-worthy dialogue: "Come on,
let the bad girl out...Come on, baby, let her out!"
Bubbles: 21/2 |
|
PASSIONS
(NBC)
The concept: Dark
Shadows x Bewitched ÷ The
Gong Show
Reason to watch: Four words:
Timmy the talking doll (Josh Ryan Evans). And we loved the
recent buried-alive plot with Sheridan Crane (McKenzie
Westmore). So what if Days of Our Lives did it in
1993?
Fast-forward alert: The
never-ending Luis/Theresa/Ethan tale, which stereotypes Hispanic
men as full of machismo.
Emmy-worthy dialogue: "I want
to leave you with something...Your sister Theresa is Ethan Crane's
mistress!"
Bubbles: 4 |
|
PORT
CHARLES (ABC)
The concept:
Third Watch + (St. Elsewhere x General Hospital)
Reason to watch: Finite, 12-week story
arcs don't tax the attention the span.
Fast-forward alert: Dr. Kevin Collins'
(Jon Lindstorm) constant blubbering over his wife's presumed death
is starting to make me cry.
Emmy-worthy dialogue: "He's a
monster, Eve; he's a walking nightmare. And once upon a
time, I thought I'd killed him."
Bubbles: 2 |
|
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